Among the many old wives’ tales associated with the US Armed Forces is that the services’ members are, well, “armed.” Nothing could be further from the truth.
Civilians may also be forgiven for supposing military personnel are surely armed while in a combat zone? Again however, they would be wrong. You see, the “hoplophobes” (those who hold an irrational fear of weapons and tools) command our “armed” forces. Outside each and every structure on a US camp in a combat zone are sand filled “Clearing Barrels.” The idea is, prior to entering any building or tent, servicemen (who are ordered to tote around an unloaded gun 99% of the time) “clears” said firearm at the barrel. What happens on a fairly regular schedule? A soldier who actually has a “useful” firearm (one that’s loaded) mixes up the sequence of first dropping the source of ammunition (magazine, belt, etc.) prior to operating the firearm’s action; pulls the trigger in the general direction of (due to complacency bred by overfamiliarity) the “clearing” barrel; and...BOOM! Hence the GI reference to the obnoxious contraptions as “Shooting Barrels.”
Like aircraft (takeoff and landing), the two most “dangerous” times when handling firearms are loading and unloading. The “safest” condition for firearms are loaded and slung or holstered, then left alone until needed to defend yourself.
The retired CID special agent whom I’d recently interviewed passed along an amusing story concerning “cleared” sidearms in a combat zone. Running late for a Bradley Fighting Vehicle ride from one to another forward operating base (FOB) to conduct soldier interviews; the agent whisked past an armed guard stationed at a mess tent’s shooting barrel. “You need to clear that pistol!” shouted the guard. “I’m a CID agent, and I’m running late.” came the now-distant reply.
As the agent wolfed down his Raisin Bran Crunch, a set of legs could be seen over the top of his bowl. “Hey. You gonna clear that pistol!” It was the sergeant of the guard. “No.” came the reply. By now, all eyes in the chow hall were on the man scarfing down his breakfast alone at a table while a cast of “authorities” came by to unsuccessfully instruct him as to what he was going to do with his sidearm.
Finally, the FOB’s “Mayor” (every FOB had a field grade officer in charge of the outpost’s day-to-day activities) appeared and announced in a loud, clear voice for all the assembled to hear: “Soldier. I am ordering you to unload that pistol.” It was at this point, the agent calmly produced from his B & C (badge and credential) wallet a folded piece of paper. When unfolded by the cocksure officer, the paper read in part: “...Army CID Special Agents, as federal law enforcement officers, will remain armed at all times, and at all locations in theater.” The memorandum was signed by Gen. George Casey, Multi-National Force-Iraq Commander. The mayor returned the paper; stomped off to the muffled amusement of the crowd; and the agent hurriedly finished his chow to catch that Bradley. Footnote: Amazingly, no one was harmed by the “hot” holstered pistol. Imagine that?
Next Week: Ashraf
Happy 34th Birthday this week to my Favorite ER Doc!
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